This is not a client's case study. This is a sharing of one of the many improvements I witnessed in myself.
Lately, I have been attending some social gatherings, and also organizing some meetups and events, hosting more than 10 pax. All these happenings seem so new and refreshing to me. This inspired me to reflect and share this in writing.
At a certain stage of my life around my late 20s, long-time friends might realize I seldom initiate to meetup, though I treasure their friendship greatly. Social activities would freak me out then, and I would frequent the loo several times before making my public appearance. Yet, no one would ever suspect I had this issue, because whenever I mixed around with others, I would always appear to be jovial, humorous and like to joke around.
Yet for those who know me when I was a young child, they would beg to differ. Because when I was young, I was a very fun, sociable and loving child. I was the "gang leader" of a big group of faithful followers in my primary school. I never shy away from attention and stage performances.
Which is the real me? Can you guess?
I was not born with the personality traits displayed in my late 20s. These were developed along the years into what is known as emotion layers (just like an onion, developing layer by layer). They are also known as "fake personalities".
The part of me that prefers a more solitary and privacy life, removed from the hustle and bustle of communal life is known as the Water Violet emotion state. A Water Violet person is very independent and self-reliant, and dislikes to impose on others. When in an imbalanced state, a Water Violet person would be closed up and have difficulty to mix with others, forming barrier and distance with others. A Water Violet person would also bear grief and sorrows in silence alone.
The other part of me that feel awkward, nervous and shy in social activities is known as the Mimulus emotion state. In an imbalanced state, a Mimulus person would be avoiding crowds, gathering and social situations.
To hide these "anti-social" behaviours from the eyes of others, I had developed yet another emotion state of Agrimony. An Agrimony person, when in an imbalanced state, would pretend everything is alright and appear to be happy to others. Worries, fears or anxieties would also be hidden behind a mask of cheerfulness, natural good humour and brave face. Sounds contradicting for a shy person to be a joker too, right? This is possible. Any of the 38 emotion states could occur concurrently, forming an unique individual.
During my journey of self-healing using Bach Flower Remedies last year, I took Water Violet, Mimulus and Agrimony with other appropriate remedies. I felt more balanced and blissful after some time, but I did not pay much attention to any improvement as I was busy with other parts of my life.
Only now, I came to realize and witness the great improvements that had already subtly happened in me. I found myself inviting long-time friends to my house for gathering, first time in my life! I found myself organizing social events for people whom I never met before at my house! I found myself totally at ease when I attended a seminar today full of people with a new friend whom I have never met in person before. I found myself able to share my worries and past wounds with new online soulmates, instead of hiding them deep inside me. Such positive changes are often heard of for those who participated in NLP (Neuro-linguistic programming), coaching or inspirational programs. But I did none of these. I only added drops of Bach Flower Remedies into my drinking water everyday during my self-healing journey.
I have become a balanced Water Violet who is able to open up to others and enjoy their company, and putting my wisdom at the service of others; I have become a balanced Mimulus that has gentle courage to overcome nervousness; I have become a balanced Agrimony who is genuinely cheerful and humourous, and have emotional honesty to deal with problems instead of making light of them.
I hope my sharing would inspire others not to give up on their self-improvement easily.
Mr Bernard was a workaholic. His workload was very heavy, compared to his other colleagues. Whenever his boss assigned him new projects, he would just accept and take them on even though he already had many other projects on-hand. I asked why he would not inform his boss about his heavy workload, and reject the new assignments. He replied he just felt he would do it as long as he could still continue to do more. In his personal life, he had the same mentality too. He would continue to push himself to keep going, even though he was already tired or feeling over-stretched. His health had been suffering and he had seen many doctors but none of them could tell what was wrong with him.
Mr Bernard had an Oak personality type. People with an Oak personality type will feel counter-intuitive to NOT push themselves to keep going, even though their bodies might be yelling at them to stop. Old habits die hard and an Oak has to make time to rest, reflect, and to intentionally work on changing patterns of behaviour. Oak are not very good patients. It goes against the grain to be in need of help - they think they should be able to do it all by themselves.
Oak was recommended for Mr Bernard to help him stay strong yet accept own limits and rest when necessary. In three weeks' time, Mr Bernard came back to share that he felt more balanced at work. Instead of driving himself further to take on more workload, he was now able to reschedule some not so urgent meetings so he could manage his other work schedules in a more manageable way. He had also learnt how to delegate some of his work assignments to relevant colleagues. He was now able to take a break and rest when needed.
Oak had indeed helped Mr Bernard bring balance back to his life and learn to make space to rest and rely on others from time to time.
To-date, Mr Bernard is still taking Oak so that he can continue to see improvement in his personality and health.
Ms Paige was very particular about her own appearance. During the consultation, I noticed she smoothed the creases in her blouse and skirt several times. She was someone who like to be neat and tidy at all times and would spend a lot of time grooming herself so that she could always look her best.
She was also very scared of touching any dirty things for the fear of contamination by germs and bacteria. For example, whenever she had to touch money notes or coins, she would quickly go and wash her hands. Hence, she would try to avoid touching notes and coins. When she had to shake someone’s hands, she would be so bothered that she could not stop thinking about the dirtiness feeling until she could wash her hands. Because of her fear of contamination, she always washed her hands and bathed several times a day.
Crab Apple was recommended for Ms Paige to help her accept her own appearance and be less stressed about being contaminated by germs and bacteria. It would also help cleanse away obsessive feelings or thoughts about unsightliness, uncleanliness and contamination.
Three weeks later, Ms Paige updated that she had become less bothered in having to look neat and tidy at all times, and become less obsessed with washing her hands and bathing several times in a day. However, she would still be concerned about touching dirty things.
I explained to Ms Paige her that some emotional imbalances would take longer to resolve as the problems could have been building up over time. However, there was already improvement as observed in her being less bothered about cleanliness and personal appearance. I encouraged her to have faith that her emotional imbalance would surely improve further over time.
To-date, Ms Paige was still taking Crab Apple and some other appropriate remedies and improvements could be observed.
Mr Barry felt sorry for being such a workaholic that he had neglected his wife, his child and his paternal family for so long. He blamed himself for hurting his wife in this way. He said he had tried to improve in this area since the beginning of this year but every time if he accidentally made his wife upset even to the slightest, he would feel so bad.
Though Mr Barry had improved for the better, there was still self-reproach. Pine was recommended for Mr Barry to help him release the burden of guilt and move on in a constructive way.
Three weeks later, Mr Barry returned to say he no longer blamed himself and he felt the previous heavy feelings had disappeared. Now, he could enjoy family time with joy, and his relationship with his wife had improved tremendously too. Pine had indeed helped Mr Barry replaced the destructiveness of self-guilt with a more positive outlook.
Mr Aaron was a simple man. In the past, he always felt contented and blissful about his simple lifestyle. He led a simple life and had no strong ambitions. His life had always been smooth-sailing generally, and he had always enjoyed the simplicity so he had never thought about having to change his lifestyle and career, or to have exciting dreams or life purpose.
However, recently, he had started thinking whether it would be right to live his life in this way. For some strange reasons, people around him, including his wife and his family were talking about how everyone should have a life purpose or dreams to pursue. Even the television programs showed some famous people giving talks about their success after surviving difficult times and how their life were exciting and fulfilling with all the ups and downs. He started to doubt his passions for his profession and his current job. Should he change his job?
The advice to Mr Aaron was to hold on to making any major decisions about switching his profession and changing his current job. Walnut was prescribed to help him stay connected to his inner voice without being unduly affected or distracted by surrounding thoughts, beliefs or opinions of others.
Three weeks later, Mr Aaron returned in good moods. He had been feeling good and was no longer perturbed about not having an exciting or meaningful life. He had come to the realization that his real wish of his own life was to be simple, healthy and happy till his old age, and there was nothing wrong with this thinking. Mr Aaron was glad that he had taken Walnut before making any haste decisions to switch his profession or change his current job.
Ms Abby, a widow, stays with her daughter and son-in-law. She felt very lonely when her daughter and son-in-law could not spend time with her. She would look forward for them to return from work, hoping they could accompany her to watch television or chat with her. But most of the time, they would be so tired after work that they would go into their own bedroom to rest, leaving her alone. She would also cook dinner for them so that they could eat with her. But sometimes, they would choose to have their dinner outside before returning home.
Ms Abby could understand they would be tired after a whole day work, and that they would like to enjoy their couple life together, but she could not help herself feeling lonely. Though Ms Abby had an active social life with many friends, she still wished her family would have more time for her.
Chicory was recommended for Ms Abby as she loved to be closed with her loved ones and she would feel lonely, hurt and disappointed if they could not spend more time with her. Chicory would help her love selflessly and unconditionally without expectation for anything in return. This would make her feel happier and more loved as a result.
Three weeks later, Ms Abby updated that her moods had become better. She had somehow become happier even though her daughter and son-in-law were still as busy and not able to spend much time with her as before. She would no longer feel lonely, hurt and disappointed if they could not spend more time with her. Instead, the little time spent with them had become quality time together and she enjoyed it greatly. She could not express in words how her love for them had changed too, but she felt different, as though her heart had become bigger. She said that the love was more for them, rather of her love to them. She expressed her surprise that so much change in her outlook could be observed within a short three weeks. I explained to her that some emotional imbalances could be resolved within a short time while some would take longer, and the effects differ in every individual.
I could fully understand what Ms Abby meant, because what she had described was unconditional love, and this is what Chicory is for. Chicory helped her to love selflessly in care and concern for others.
Ms Judy was afraid of the dark. Every night when she was resting in her bed waiting for sleep to come, she would feel fearful of what might be out there in the dark. She had to leave the lights on during bedtimes. Sometimes, when her husband was away for overseas business trips, she would have difficulties sleeping alone and would always have nightmares. After probing further, it was discovered that she had an apprehensive fear of death, creepiness and supernatural beings, though she had never really seen a ghost before.
In Ms Judy's case, she had unknown, free-floating and groundless fear that seem to come for no reason. Aspen helps one to realize the emptiness of their fears and put them into perspective, and to have faith and confidence to overcome any fear. Aspen was recommended for Ms Judy. After a period of time, Ms Judy shared that though she still had not fully overcome her fear of death, she can now sleep well like a baby. She is no longer bothered by her fears of what could be out there in the dark as she sleeps.
Success Stories about Bach Flower Remedies - Healing for better emotion and health
Thanks to the clients who are willing to grant permission to post their cases so that their stories may inspire others to use Bach Flower Remedies to have a more fulfilling and satisfying life too.